Martin Henderson

Future Archaeologists will no doubt be astounded when they find the remains of Martin Henderson, Head of Westmorland Primary School in Greater Manchester. Unique amongst the Headmaster species, he appears to have a spine.

He has had enough of wretched parents swearing at their offspring and each other on the school premises. He has declared that from now on, anyone doing so will be told to leave.

Now whether he does actually do this; or whether some Human Rights organisation decides to stand up for the rights of the Underclass to express themselves freely, remains to be seen.

For now however, he deserves to be our hero of the day.

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Gadget in the Telegraph

Have a read of Inspector Gadget's article in the Telegraph about the tragic case of Fiona Pilkington. As usual he hits the nail squarely on the head with regard to where the problems really lie.

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Coursework

I've written about Coursework before- how it used to be a complete farce when the pupils did it at home. (Those with good parents got them to help, or pay me to do it; whilst those whose parents wore gold chains and football shirts simply lost it)

No doubt entirely due to my rantings, the system was changed so that Coursework is now done in school under something like exam style conditions. This has been a big improvement and generally results in work being handed in that has mainly been done by the kids themselves.

So far, so good. Now their teacher marks it.

Hang on a minute, I hear you say. Their own teacher actually marks their exam work? Oh yes.

My friend Ernie is a strict marker. If it's wrong then it gets marked wrong. Unfortunately this results in his groups getting lower Coursework marks than the others, which reflects badly on him. His protests that the other teachers mark far too softly have fallen on deaf ears, as the marking guidelines are open to a huge range of interpretation because the questions themselves are often vague. Last week he showed me half a dozen examples of answers where the pupil clearly had no idea what is going on, but they had been given almost full marks by others in his department. It was very sad to see.

"There's only one thing for it!" he declared sagely. "I need to sort myself out and start marking these wrong answers right. That's the way forward"

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Ebay

Over a year ago, I abandoned the useless monolith that is BT and bought a Dongle from Orange so that I could continue to waste my time on the Internet. It works extremely well.

Yesterday however, I got my comeuppance. In a last ditch bid to join the Modern World, I attempted to sell my first item on Ebay. After spending an hour working my way through the advert, taking a photo and uploading it; I was informed that I wouldn't be able to go any further because I did not have a landline.

I have a bank account, a credit card, mortgage, driving licence, and passport (What a rip off they are now- seventy odd quid and half the people I saw last month at Luton airport smugly joining the special queue couldn't even get them to scan.) However because I lack a plug in telephone, the tired old rustbucket that once carried us proudly around the country must remain gently decaying on my drive.

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Very Impressive

In a world of ever increasing regulation and "can't do that" culture in schools, it's good to see two kids showing a huge amount of ingenuity, resourcefulness and just $150 to take photographs of the Earth from a height of 17 miles (about three times higher than a commercial airliner flies at)

Here's the link to the newspaper article and here is their own website

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For God's Sake Even I Can Do This

Try this little test:

Imagine that you are blindfolded and there is a bag in front of you containing a large number of five different types of sweet. How many must you take out of the bag to be certain of having chosen three of the same type?

Think about it for a few minutes, it's not that hard.

Now if you got the right answer, phone up your local Primary School and offer to teach the staff.

(The answer's in this article)

Apparently only one in five new British Primary School Teachers can solve this problem, which according to their spokesperson; means that 75% can't.

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Names

Last week's news (what else would you expect from me?) included a survey claiming that teachers often looked at their class lists for the new year and made judgements on what the pupils would be like, purely on the basis of their first name.

The article was clearly inspired by my award winning game Top Set, Bottom Set. What really shocks me though, is that only 49% admitted to judging by name, indicating a worrying decline in the IQ of new teachers.

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